ARCHIVE - Life after abuse

your heart will fall for it, but your head needs to keep strong... i know its so hard, i struggled to report mine for the "nice" messages, just ignored them (crying buckets) till they changed and then reported the threats when they came, along with the other attempts at being "nice". its part of a pattern that most of them go through, the nice, the nasty, see which one makes it go away, and the trouble is that if you let him learn that all he has to do is to tell you he loves you and it DOES go away, he'll just keep doing the same. he needs to learn that if he does bad things, then bad things happen - like the court system, like you not being there, otherwise there is no incentive to change... and honestly, and this is only my opinion im personally not sure they ever can! but im hoping given the amount of them out there that im just being overy pessimstic with that one! all the best, really hope things work out for you

hugs
QOW
xxx

i dont no what to do anymore i spoke to him last night and he just listened to how he made me feel and why i cant be with him very quiet and gentle on the fone he said he didnt no why he did it he didnt want to hurt me but something happens and he loses his temper i asked him can u promis me u'll never hit me again he said right now at this moment yes i said can u trust urself tho and he said no i dont want to ever hit u again but no i cant promise i wont which i do think is very honest of him but also gives me alot more strength cause if he cant even promis me the world for this hooneymoon period then unless he get proper profession help on his own with out me being with him and sorts himself out he has no chance of havin me back i wont go back unless he gets help and is at the end of his help and can prove to social services he isnt a threat to our daughter n my 3 boys cause i wont have them put on high risk for anyone